Not My Home


Leaving a piece of your heart halfway across the globe has interesting and long lasting side effects.

Almost two years ago I went to Tanzania. I talk about it a lot on this blog, and I’m not sorry for that. It has been one of the most impactful experiences of my life. I made wonderful friends and left a huge piece of my heart there, hoping to be able to go back, but not certain if I ever would be able to.

After coming home, I wrote a heartfelt post about how difficult it was to adjust to life back in California. During those first few weeks back home, I scrolled endlessly through pictures and cried many tears. I told stories and sat in memories. I texted my Tanzania friends almost daily and prayed for them constantly. I was, admittedly, resistant to adjusting back to American life. I had changed, and as a friend so aptly pointed out, had outgrown the box I had left behind. I didn’t fit into the life I had lived before going overseas. Transitioning home was hard.

But eventually, it happened. Trips down memory lane were less frequent. I’ve forgotten many of the details of life in Tanzania. There was still a hole in my heart, an occasional ache in my chest, but I did readjust to California. As the semester picked up and I moved on toward preparing for graduation, other things captured my attention. Texting friends from Tanzania slowed to about once a month. A year later, I was only texting occasionally. I didn’t need the constant communication in order to feel like I could keep breathing.

Yes, there were certain sights, certain smells, certain tastes, certain songs, certain scriptures that would remind me of them. The song “Living Hope,” chai tea, and Ephesians 2 are forever tied with the dear friends I made in Tanzania. But just like they told me I would, I had learned to adjust to my world back home. I didn’t believe them, but it happened.

Last night I accidentally stumbled across a video from the first few weeks back home. A friend in Tanzania sent me a video of a bunch of them saying hello. I remember the tears I cried when I watched it for the first time…I remember because I cried those same tears again last night. I had forgotten what their voices sounded like, and it brought me to tears to hear them talking again. I haven’t cried about anything in weeks, months maybe. But I cried last night as I watched the video over and over. In those moments I was transported back to the weeks immediately after my trip. An old, familiar ache returned. An ache I had forgotten, but recognized immediately. The ache of missing someone you love deeply. The ache of leaving a piece of your heart in another land. The ache that had been my friend during the first few months after returning home.

But where is ‘home’ now anyway? I’ve been to three other countries (Mexico, Tanzania, and Haiti). I’ve left pieces of my heart there. I’ve left pieces of my heart across the country, across the globe, across town, and just over the hill at school. I care about people, and it is having people to love that makes it ‘home’ for me. I can’t call one place ‘home’ and another ‘away from home.’

Someone told me shortly after I got back that I would discover that it doesn’t get easier to leave a piece of your heart somewhere. You don’t get it back. That ache will always be there. It is a constant reminder that nowhere on this earth will ever be ‘home.’ Rather, my home is in heaven…

It caught me by surprise that the tears and ache would still be here, one and a half years later. It shocked me that it could still feel so intense. I was not expecting that.

But then again, should it really surprise me? Once you leave a piece of your heart somewhere, with someone, it never comes back to you. No it is forever there, no matter where you are.

And it serves as a constant reminder that this world is not our home. The ache for my ‘other’ earthly ‘home(s)’ reminds me that I should be longing with the same (or greater) intensity for my heavenly home.

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